How to Prepare for Your Natural Birth | A Birth Story

By: Care Messer | Hypnobirthing | June 21, 2019

Meet January, James and Jack! January had a very specific picture in her mind about what she wanted her birth to look like. So her trick was starting out with the end result and then working her way backwards in figuring out how to get there! And it worked! Where do do you want to go with your birth experience? Getting more information education ahead of time is a simpler way to get there. Then, you go with the flow for how this baby wants to enter the world! James also share some great advice how to help yourself as the partner feel more confident in the birth process.

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Video Transcript:

– Awesome. We definitely are grateful for this class because we used a lot of the stuff that we practiced in here. But it was also different than, I think how we either of us have pictured it.

– Yeah. So, just to kind of set the scene for you. Megan and I coach lacrosse. On Wednesday night we were out at lacrosse practice and went home

– Yeah had some dinner went to bed Woke up at 12:30 in the morning with Megan pushing me saying “My water just broke.”

– Yeah, I woke up thinking I just had to pee and so I got out of bed and all of a sudden it was like things were leaking. And I was like, “This is not pee.” And so, it was just kind of a slow leak. It wasn’t like a big waterfall gush or anything. And, yes, so I woke Nico up. And he was like, “What? “Seriously?” So, we were so excited. We were like, “Okay. Don’t get too excited.”

– [Interviewer] “Okay We got time.”

– “We got this. Yeah, relax. Like okay, let’s take showers “and hang out on the couch and watch TV. Just ride it out. And so we did that. We went out to the living room and just started-

– Yes, so it was at first it was you know fun and we were hanging out and relaxing. Then Megan was like, “Oh, I’m starting to feel them a little bit. And it feels like cramps”

– Yeah, and I said, “Is this a contraction? “I don’t know. “I feel like I would know if it was a contraction.”

– Very quickly it turned into the real, real deal.

– Yeah, we went out in the living room for 20 minutes until I started feeling them. And I was like, “I think I should start timing these. And just to see like where I’m at. And —

– At this point we had called our doula and let her know. Woke her up in the middle of the night.

– Yeah

– Called the hospital. Let them know that we’re probably gonna be coming in at some point this morning.

– Yeah

– Yeah, and then you started used the ball

– They were six minutes apart

– A little bit.

– Yeah, I used the birth ball. So okay, all the things that we practiced here came naturally to us when we were at home. Like, when I was in the shower Nico lit candles in our room. So, it was a super relaxing environment. He turned on music for us. And we have our little affirmations hanging up in our room all over the place. So, that was like little reminders as I got out of the shower and stuff. So, everything was cool and then as the contractions started getting more intense I was like, “Okay, we really gotta dig deep into remembering what the things we learned.” So, using the birth ball and like stretching out over it and breathing. Like for me, at home I could still I am still like very aware of how I was to handling contractions. And I could kinda talk through it with him And breath through it. And I started getting into a rhythm like a pattern where I would count my breaths. I wasn’t counting out loud I was counting in my head. But I kinda knew it would take me about 10 breaths to get through a contraction.

– Surge.

– Yeah, surge. A surge. And, so by the time fifth or sixth breath came around I was like, ” Okay, I got this. I’ll ride it out.” And then I had like five minutes to you know relax before the next one. But sure enough they started coming on a lot quicker.

– Yeah so Todd called the doula when we were just over like four minutes, 4:11 and she said hang out

– We still have time

– Still got time. And very quickly we got to about 2:11.

– And she’s like put Megan back in the shower get her back in the shower and then get your stuff together and you guys can head out to the hospital By this time it was 6 o’clock in the morning. So, I got in the shower and I did not want to get out. So I was sitting in the bath tub and the shower was on and it took me forever to get out and they were just getting more and more intense. To the point where I couldn’t talk through them anymore I couldn’t breath through them. I had to like really focus on breathing through them. Meanwhile, as this is going on, Nico is like seriously such a champ he was running around the house getting our bags together he would come in, push the start on our when I was like so “Okay starting and push the start on our search timer thing and help me work through it. Be behind me.

– As soon as we hit stop I’d like run out to grab the car like pull it up to the front then we were like into the next one. And then it was like all right now grab the bags load them in and then we’re like

– So amazing, yeah

– We were two weeks before our due dates. So – Yeah We weren’t 100% ready. Yeah

– So anyways we head out and Megan was in the back seat.

– I had my 40 blinks on which are the best Total lifesaver. Because at this point it was 7:15 in the morning like prime traffic. And as soon as we got on the 56 it was like dead stop and go traffic. And thank god for those 40 blinks. And I feel so bad because we were bumper to bumper traffic and I’m in the back seat on all fours just probably looking like a crazy person because I have those things on my eyes. And he’s like, “I’m wondering what people are thinking at this point.” But the great thing is I had no worries in the world because I couldn’t see anything. Those things are amazing. So it took us 45 minutes to get to the hospital. Which we always hear, laboring in the car is the worst. And it’s the worst. 45 minutes, but…

– You did it.

– Yeah it was good, we made it there…

– So we got there and they had us in triage and they were kinda assessing Megan unfortunately her blood pressure was a little bit too high so we weren’t able to get into the burning center.

– Yeah, which is a bummer that was what we wanted we wanted to be in the burning center. But, I don’t know my contractions felt at this point so close together I didn’t feel like I had, sorry surges. I didn’t like I had much of a break in between and so they were taking my blood pressure but it would be right before a surge was about to start. So I didn’t feel like I could calm myself down and get a nice low blood pressure. So after being in triage for like I don’t know, how long were we in there? It felt like a long time, maybe an hour?

– Yeah.

– Then finally they were just like Oh you ready so we’re going to send you to labor and delivery. So while we were in triage my first contraction, or surge once we got up into the room out of the elevator my body started pushing which was crazy because I didn’t know how far along I was I had never been checked at any of my pre-natal appointments. So I had no idea how far along I was in the spectrum. And my body started pushing and I was like holy smokes this is crazy because it was totally involuntary. And right after we got into the room I started bleeding and blood started pooling up down by my ankles and that scared me a lot.

– It scared the shit out of me. For whatever reason I was not expecting that. And nurses were really confident they were like, “Yeah that’s normal, that happens.” They kinda like talked us through everything but that definitely

– Yeah

– scared me. But good to be prepared to know that that kind of stuff is coming.

– Yeah, and from there it got more and more intense. So they came in, they brought in a delivery cart because they were thinking like well if your body’s pushing that means it might be close. And then the midwife came in, and she checked me and she was like okay you’re at a 5 and I’m thinking, “Oh my god, we’re only at a 5?” Just like how we talk about in class maybe you don’t want to know the number because then you’re thinking like holy smokes I’m only halfway there and I have so much further to go and this is so intense and I’m doing everything I can but I feel like I’m starting to get to the out of body experience.

– And then at this point it was when our doula showed up she was caught in some really nasty traffic getting to the hospital. And it was God sent to have her.

– Oh my god.

– I didn’t realize how much they obviously you hear about it but the difference between when she got there and before she got there, was huge. And so then it was like a real team effort

– Yeah the three of us. getting through this.

– She was amazing.

– And then they moved us to a labor and delivery room Yeah she was amazing, she was helping us to change positions. And like at this point I was beyond like, I felt not not able to be coherent. I was totally in that primal instinct mode where I wasn’t making eye contact with people I wasn’t like talking to the nurses I was just kind of like in my zone. And I had the four legs on still a lot during this part. And We got to a point where we were in the bathroom. Me, I’m sitting in the toilet with Nico and Britney, our doula, and we got to a point where I felt like it was so intense I said to them like “You guy I don’t know if I can do this” I don’t know if I’m gonna be able to make it all the way to the end. And they were amazing they Britney started to tell me, she’s like “Megan, you can do this. You got this” They both talk me through it. They started to tell me like “Okay you’re out of time, you can start pushing” So, that was probably like two hours

– Mm-hmm

– After we got to the hospital

– Mm-hmm

– So it the events were pretty fast once we got there And Once they said that, I’ve been pushing through all my surges since I got to the hospital Not because I wanted to just because oh my god it was really So, once they said you can start pushing now. Okay here we go my doula was like “All right, by the time you guys go to the bathroom and take a few more contractions or surges in there and then come out and we can cross the finish line” and that was I would never forget that. I’m so grateful for suggesting that. Because, she sent us to the bathroom and At this point I was like I wasn’t talking But, we sat down and Nico and I were able to have a moment, just the two of us. She closed the door and We just looked at each other and I was just like I had to look into his eyes for that strength and support because. I’m so pretty much just beat at this point and And I’ll never forget that because I truly thought I couldn’t have done it. Like without you. So we cried a lot

– Yeah it was definitely a team effort I mean My god, you’re gonna make me cry Yep, I think I’m proud every single day since we had this baby. But yeah, it was absolutely team effort and I just wanna really telling her. You are incredible, you’re a champ. And it was just that like moment of clarity. We walked back up to the table

– Yeah Yup

– Bringing him put Megan in on all force

– Yeah, the leaned the back of the hospital bed up and so I was on my knees, on the bed, and holding on to the back of the bed which is good. I really liked that cause that position for pushing And then they said “Okay here we go” And so, I think we had five surges?

– Mm-hmm

– And then the baby was out but it was awesome because Nico was able to see as the head was coming. He would like go down and check it out. Come up and tell me how it was going. “I can see hair, I can see his headway” And Britney had me reach down and feel his head which was amazing and yeah, as his head. It felt like his head is half-way up for a really long time. It was helpful to have those progress because I felt like I was getting nowhere. Just like talked about in his class “Two steps forward, one step back” And it felt like we’re in place for a long time. But, Yeah and then finally he came out and They passed it to me between my legs and I turned over We waited for the cord to finish pulsing. Nico got to cut the cord and that was awesome.

– Yeah

– And he was immediately on my chest. I didn’t have to ask for that and just that was their standard protocol. They stitched me up a little bit. I had a second degree tear and While they were doing that, he was already latching on which was awesome. And Yeah

– He was born at 11:45 so water broke at 12:30 in the morning less than almost like 11 hours.

– Yeah So it was kind of it was way faster than we were expecting I thought we were gonna have more time to like doing the movements stuff in my But once we got to the hospital, it was really hard for me to like focus on trying different things

– Maybe it was your first time

– Making though

– Yeah

– My whole body oh my gosh it was the most intense physically intense like challenging thing I’ve ever been through But, by far the most meaningful experience that I’ve ever had. It was yeah. It was incredible. It is incredible. And truly I think like the things that we learned in this class about supporting each other are fundamental to having like a successful birth. For what we’re all looking for you know like it was. It was totally natural we didn’t use any medications. Or anything like that But like The best relationship building and bonding experience like. I would never forget. I’ll never forget that. I won’t. It’s amazing. So If you like this video, share it with a friend and subscribe to our page. And for more information, go to to help rewrite your birth.

About the author:
Care is the founder of the Birth Education Center, San Diego HypnoBirthing and Cuddle Sanctuary San Diego. She is a Birth Educator, Hypnotherapist, Birth and Postpartum Doula, INNATE Care Provider, Erotic Blueprint Coach and also professional Cuddler. She specializes in connection work between people and increasing self boundaries for a more balanced life together.


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